Well.....
You can obviously see that I completely stopped blogging and dieting the week I returned to work full time. I would weigh every once in a while and it seemed like I was maintaining and even got back into the 240's so I didn't stress about it. Returning to teaching full time and caring for Amelia in the evenings alone (hubby still working in Chapel Hill, an hour and 15 min. away) has been incredibly difficult. By the time I get home (myself commuting 1 hour btw), feed, bathe, and put Amelia down for bed it was 7:30 or 8:00 and the last thing I wanted to do was exercise. So I didn't! Jillian Michaels is now coated with dust.
I am disappointed in myself, but also proud of myself for handling all of these life changes with a positive attitude. I did not get depressed, because the way I was living each day was hard and I deserved a little credit just for surviving.
But now things are changing again, and for the better:
1. School is out!
2. Hubby is getting moved to 1st shift and will be home in the evenings!
3. We are moving to our own home which will shorten both of our commutes!
Therefore, I am ready to hop back on the diet/exercise train!
I thought about weighing today, but did not (mostly because I already packed the scale- moving in 1.5 weeks). But I also wanted to give myself an adjustment week of just getting back into healthy eating so that *in case* I have gained back all 15 pounds that I lost in March I won't crush my spirit.
My goal is to start eating healthy for one full week, and then to slowly add back in my exercise goals of cardio 5 times a week. I really hope that having the hubby at home in the evenings starting July 2nd, will free me up to go out walking or to do a video. I want to badly to join a gym, but our finances are tight right now, so I will have to motivate myself in other ways (like making a kickass IPOD mix).
My goal is lose 15 pounds before the summer is over and I return back to work.
My bigger long term goal is to get out of the damn 200's forever, and to continue to eat well and exercise even once school starts back!
My Last Fat Meal
My love-hate relationship with food and exercise.
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
Goodbye 240's....
Shit. Damn.
I pretty much have continued my horrible eating since last weekend. On my Thursday weigh-in I was up to 250.4, which is a gain of 2.6 pounds. Eeek. I thought that having a bad weigh-in on Thursday would whip my butt into shape, but instead I met my hubby at Moe's and ate mucho queso. Bad Bad Bad.
Then tonight I had wine and pizza (totally against all of my rules). I keep thinking in the back of my head that I will start fresh tomorrow and I keep telling myself that I *deserve* to cheat. WRONG. I really do not know how to get past this mentality! I named this blog "my last fat meal" because this is what I do when I start ANY diet. I do good for a few weeks, start feeling really good about myself, and then blow it with cheating and fat meals that add up very quickly.
I keep reminding myself that every day is an opportunity to make good choices, and then I get so weak when that fast food or bad food is nearby. I will be so upset if I gain 2 weeks in a row. I know that I need to commit to making this weekend really count towards my goal, and I really hope that I can stay strong and get back on track. I am about to start working in 1 week, and if I can't make this diet work now, how will I ever be able to then!?!
I miss the way I felt last week when the scale showed the 240's. I hope that is motivation for me this week.
I pretty much have continued my horrible eating since last weekend. On my Thursday weigh-in I was up to 250.4, which is a gain of 2.6 pounds. Eeek. I thought that having a bad weigh-in on Thursday would whip my butt into shape, but instead I met my hubby at Moe's and ate mucho queso. Bad Bad Bad.
Then tonight I had wine and pizza (totally against all of my rules). I keep thinking in the back of my head that I will start fresh tomorrow and I keep telling myself that I *deserve* to cheat. WRONG. I really do not know how to get past this mentality! I named this blog "my last fat meal" because this is what I do when I start ANY diet. I do good for a few weeks, start feeling really good about myself, and then blow it with cheating and fat meals that add up very quickly.
I keep reminding myself that every day is an opportunity to make good choices, and then I get so weak when that fast food or bad food is nearby. I will be so upset if I gain 2 weeks in a row. I know that I need to commit to making this weekend really count towards my goal, and I really hope that I can stay strong and get back on track. I am about to start working in 1 week, and if I can't make this diet work now, how will I ever be able to then!?!
I miss the way I felt last week when the scale showed the 240's. I hope that is motivation for me this week.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Return of the Binge
Oh Shit! did I mess up this weekend.
I hate to say it, but I think I just over thought the impending weekend and all of the temptations until it was ALL I could think about.
Here are all of the things I cheated on and messed up:
1. Cake, cake, and more cake (I'm talking thick icing with creme in the middle)
2. Cheese Puffs (really!?!- I don't even like these!)
3. Beer
4. Wine
5. B-52 shots
6. Chick-fil-a freaking nuggets- a million of them. (damn party tray)
7. Cinnamon Pound Crumb Cake (seriously, who buys these things!)
8. Spinach Dip
9. French Onion Dip
10. M&M's
Looking over this list makes me almost want to vomit! I worked so hard for 3 weeks and was feeling so great about myself, and then I binged over a celebratory weekend with family and friends (my dad's 60th birthday party). At first I told myself it was my cheat day and that I deserved a little splurge. But this quickly turned into a splurge weekend. It is so true that you crave what you eat. It was so hard to get back on track today. I know that I can not change any of my choices or correct them quickly, and am ready to face the consequences on the scale on Thursday. I am happy that I have not given up on my goals, but I am still disappointed in myself. This weekend just brings up past yo-yo dieting memories and the emotional effect it has had in my past. It makes me want to avoid parties and social gatherings centered on food, which is SO hard to do. I wish I had more will power!
Well, back to focusing on tomorrow instead of yesterday.
I hate to say it, but I think I just over thought the impending weekend and all of the temptations until it was ALL I could think about.
Here are all of the things I cheated on and messed up:
1. Cake, cake, and more cake (I'm talking thick icing with creme in the middle)
2. Cheese Puffs (really!?!- I don't even like these!)
3. Beer
4. Wine
5. B-52 shots
6. Chick-fil-a freaking nuggets- a million of them. (damn party tray)
7. Cinnamon Pound Crumb Cake (seriously, who buys these things!)
8. Spinach Dip
9. French Onion Dip
10. M&M's
Looking over this list makes me almost want to vomit! I worked so hard for 3 weeks and was feeling so great about myself, and then I binged over a celebratory weekend with family and friends (my dad's 60th birthday party). At first I told myself it was my cheat day and that I deserved a little splurge. But this quickly turned into a splurge weekend. It is so true that you crave what you eat. It was so hard to get back on track today. I know that I can not change any of my choices or correct them quickly, and am ready to face the consequences on the scale on Thursday. I am happy that I have not given up on my goals, but I am still disappointed in myself. This weekend just brings up past yo-yo dieting memories and the emotional effect it has had in my past. It makes me want to avoid parties and social gatherings centered on food, which is SO hard to do. I wish I had more will power!
Well, back to focusing on tomorrow instead of yesterday.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Hello 240's!
Week 3 Weigh-In:
Last week: 252.0
This week: 247.8
Weekly loss: 4.2 lbs!!!
Total loss: 14.7 lbs!
I was SO happy that the scale moved this week for me since last week I only lost a few ounces. I had wanted to quit after last week and indulge in food since I was working so hard and not seeing scale results. But in the back of mind I remembered that sometimes the scale takes a while to register what you are doing! Yippee! I am so close to reaching another 5 lb. milestone and goal.
I still have not bought my 5 lb. sneakers, or gone to my 10 lb. mani/pedi, but that was mostly because I was worried about spending money. Now that I have a job on the horizon, watch-out!, Jenny is going to get some pampering done! Really hoping I survive this weekend and have another good weigh-in next week. Time to up the exercising again. (moan, sigh, curse).
Oh, and next week will mark my first monthly progress report where I am going to do measurements and a picture. (Are you as excited as me?)
Last week: 252.0
This week: 247.8
Weekly loss: 4.2 lbs!!!
Total loss: 14.7 lbs!
I was SO happy that the scale moved this week for me since last week I only lost a few ounces. I had wanted to quit after last week and indulge in food since I was working so hard and not seeing scale results. But in the back of mind I remembered that sometimes the scale takes a while to register what you are doing! Yippee! I am so close to reaching another 5 lb. milestone and goal.
I still have not bought my 5 lb. sneakers, or gone to my 10 lb. mani/pedi, but that was mostly because I was worried about spending money. Now that I have a job on the horizon, watch-out!, Jenny is going to get some pampering done! Really hoping I survive this weekend and have another good weigh-in next week. Time to up the exercising again. (moan, sigh, curse).
Oh, and next week will mark my first monthly progress report where I am going to do measurements and a picture. (Are you as excited as me?)
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
March Madness
Well I have officially *sucked* at blogging this week!
I slowly got over my cold after finally getting some antibiotics last Friday. I will honestly admit that I did not do ANY exercise this week beyond the occasional walking in the park. Even walking seemed to make me have a coughing fit, so Jillian Michaels and I did not have any meetings this week. Looks like my Ripped in 30 is turning into Ripped in 40-50 ;)
Here are some victories and struggles of dieting this week:
1. Being sick dropped my appetite and desire to drink wine
2. Being sick led to decreased workouts
3. I was able to go to a party on a Saturday night and avoid ALL of the ah-ma-zing treats that I wanted to eat!
4. I went to a party and didn't have any alcohol
5. I planned my meals and stuck to my plan
6. I cheated on Tuesday for my dad's birthday (and totally paid for it with an upset stomach)
7. I got a job (!) which is both exciting financially and terrifying for my diet
8. I stayed within my points for the week, but did not do a good job of tracking them online (which is a slippery slope)
Well, there it is! Tomorrow is weigh-in day and I hope the numbers keep going down so I can reach my goals. I have a very challenging weekend coming up due to my dad's 60th birthday party on Saturday as well as the ACC tourney. I know it seems silly, but there are certain times in my life that I just associate with food, and the month of March is one of them. There is usually a lot of drinking, celebrating, and eating junk food that comes along with being a basketball fan. I hope I can plan some healthy alternatives and avoid the alcohol except for my one planned night of Saturday.
I slowly got over my cold after finally getting some antibiotics last Friday. I will honestly admit that I did not do ANY exercise this week beyond the occasional walking in the park. Even walking seemed to make me have a coughing fit, so Jillian Michaels and I did not have any meetings this week. Looks like my Ripped in 30 is turning into Ripped in 40-50 ;)
Here are some victories and struggles of dieting this week:
1. Being sick dropped my appetite and desire to drink wine
2. Being sick led to decreased workouts
3. I was able to go to a party on a Saturday night and avoid ALL of the ah-ma-zing treats that I wanted to eat!
4. I went to a party and didn't have any alcohol
5. I planned my meals and stuck to my plan
6. I cheated on Tuesday for my dad's birthday (and totally paid for it with an upset stomach)
7. I got a job (!) which is both exciting financially and terrifying for my diet
8. I stayed within my points for the week, but did not do a good job of tracking them online (which is a slippery slope)
Well, there it is! Tomorrow is weigh-in day and I hope the numbers keep going down so I can reach my goals. I have a very challenging weekend coming up due to my dad's 60th birthday party on Saturday as well as the ACC tourney. I know it seems silly, but there are certain times in my life that I just associate with food, and the month of March is one of them. There is usually a lot of drinking, celebrating, and eating junk food that comes along with being a basketball fan. I hope I can plan some healthy alternatives and avoid the alcohol except for my one planned night of Saturday.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Week 2 Weigh-In
Drumroll please..... 252.0
This week's total is -.9 lbs
Total loss is -10.5 lbs
I was happy that the scale was down even though it was only a little. I finally hit the 10 lb. mark!
I am still feeling like crud from this cold I have, so I hope it goes away stat so I can get back to working out and introducing myself to the 240's again!
This week's total is -.9 lbs
Total loss is -10.5 lbs
I was happy that the scale was down even though it was only a little. I finally hit the 10 lb. mark!
I am still feeling like crud from this cold I have, so I hope it goes away stat so I can get back to working out and introducing myself to the 240's again!
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Obstacles
Well, Week 2 has definitely had some obstacles.
I made it through the weekend with flying colors, savoring every sip of my two glasses of wine on Saturday night. I worked out Sunday and was thinking this might be the week I bust out of the 250's.
Then Monday arrived. I had to take my mom to the ER because she was having severe pain (turned out ok!) and I was faced with my first obstacle: Vending Machines. I know this seems silly, but I am *such* a sucker for junk food that comes out of a machine. I was starving and so tempted to just give in the the voice saying, "it is an unusual circumstance, your diet takes the backseat!" I didn't give in and ate a granola bar instead. I was able to stay within my points for every day this week!
However, then my second obstacle arrived: I got sick too.
Being sick did not wreck my eating habits, but it did wreck my work out schedule. There has been no Jillian Michaels in my life since Sunday. I did however go walking today.
Overall, this week has just been a little off. I didn't have the energy to plan or cook good meals. I didn't have the energy to work out, but I still made such better choices than I would have 2 weeks ago.
I do not think tomorrow's weigh-in will be something to cheer about, but I am just hoping I didn't gain any weight! Holding my breath until the morning.
I made it through the weekend with flying colors, savoring every sip of my two glasses of wine on Saturday night. I worked out Sunday and was thinking this might be the week I bust out of the 250's.
Then Monday arrived. I had to take my mom to the ER because she was having severe pain (turned out ok!) and I was faced with my first obstacle: Vending Machines. I know this seems silly, but I am *such* a sucker for junk food that comes out of a machine. I was starving and so tempted to just give in the the voice saying, "it is an unusual circumstance, your diet takes the backseat!" I didn't give in and ate a granola bar instead. I was able to stay within my points for every day this week!
However, then my second obstacle arrived: I got sick too.
Being sick did not wreck my eating habits, but it did wreck my work out schedule. There has been no Jillian Michaels in my life since Sunday. I did however go walking today.
Overall, this week has just been a little off. I didn't have the energy to plan or cook good meals. I didn't have the energy to work out, but I still made such better choices than I would have 2 weeks ago.
I do not think tomorrow's weigh-in will be something to cheer about, but I am just hoping I didn't gain any weight! Holding my breath until the morning.
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