I can not tell you how many times I have said this to myself; "This will be my last fat meal." Then I promise myself that I will get back on the dieting train I have been riding for the bulk of my life. I am seldom ever able to follow through with my plans and end up repeating the process over and over and over, racking up a very high number of "last fat meals."
I am tired of having last fat meals.
I am tired of recommitting myself to dieting.
I am SO tired of losing the same 10, 15, 20, and 30 (50+) pounds over and over again.
This blog will be my attempt to lose weight and (wait for it.....) keep it off!
I am not sure what I expect. I don't even know if I want to share this blog with anyone because I am embarrassed by my current weight, and feel like I will let down any readers if I fail or fall of the diet train again. I hope that it will keep me accountable, even if I am the only one who reads it.
I hope it works and I hope I can stay strong.
Until then, I'm off to plan my last, last fat meal.
Okay, do not be embarrassed. If it will help, every time you post a number, I'll post a number. I tell you not to be embarrassed and I have no right to b/c I am also embarrassed by mine! Since I had little Z, I have not been able to commit either and it frustrates me that I have also lost 30 pounds before so - why the hell can't I do it again? Let me start... :) I currently weight 177 pounds (eek) which is 3 pounds shy of my highest weight. My goal is 150. I have a long way to go, especially b/c Zaiya's birthday cake is still in my fridge and for some reason If feel the need to eat a bit of it every night mostly b/c I starve myself by eating lettuce/raw pepper wraps throughout the day, lol. Jenny - I am ready to take this journey with you. :) I love you and I believe in you and WE CAN DO IT. ;) xoxoxo Krays
ReplyDeleteAlso, don't be so hard on yourself. It took me about 1.5 years to lose my baby weight, I lost it and got down to about 170 and then swiftly managed to get back to 185 in no time. I'm mostly in the "then some" part now which seems even harder. Everyone's body processes it differently, I know you know this. I can tell you that one thing I did when I lost 30 lbs before was got up early, ate w/in 20 minutes of being awake to kick start my metabolism. I haven't yet been able to get in that habit again. Maybe I'll try committing to that now. I'll keep you updated! :)
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